Maintenance Ninja

The maintenance man at my hotel is a freaking ninja! WAIT! Before you call me crazy, take a look at the facts:

1) He's supposedly Mexican but looks suspiciously Asian.

2) He always wears dark colors... Ya know, so you can't see him in the dark.

3) He drives a Bravada..... Who drives an Oldsmobile anymore? I'll tell you who. A ninja.

4) He doesn't speak ANY English. When's the last time you saw a ninja speak English? WRONG... You never hear a ninja speak.

5) He's got these weird throwing stars disguised as "tools".

6) He's always "fixing" things. Now there are traps laid all over my hotel! I'm certain of it.

7( <----- He turned this parenthesis around when I wasn't looking.

8) He moves completely silently! I never hear him until he makes a noise.

9) I always see him sweeping the parking lot.... AKA Hiding in plain sight!

10) I'm pretty sure that pole he uses to clean the pool is actually a katana.

So there you have it. Indisputable proof that my maintenance man is a ninja in disguise. Don't say anything though. He doesn't know I'm onto him.